Growing up, I rarely realized how lucky I was. Not just for the big things like enough to eat, safety, and opportunity, but for the smaller things, like having a real birthday every year. I don’t mean a huge party or tons of friends coming over,but my birthday always felt like MY birthday. I realize that may seem silly to many people, but if you have a birthday between November and January, you know exactly what I mean.
Holiday adjacency is tough for birthdays, especially for kids born during winter months. Having a birthday so close to Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, or Christmas can easily make your special day seem overshadowed. But my parents always came through. I never had anyone try to double up on presents, except in a few rare occasions when I was a bit older and asked for a larger gift , understanding that it would cover several holidays.
Now, with my own son having a December birthday, I can already feel some of the pressure. I know how important it was to me to have a special birthday when I was young, and while an almost two-year-old may not notice much, soon, my son is likely to have the same feelings. How do I make his birthday special for him, especially without breaking the bank?
Separating Days
I was pretty lucky in being born ten days early, on December 14. Had I been born on schedule, Christmas Eve would’ve been a bit more difficult for my parents to make feel special for me. But I think one of the keys is to make sure there is a separate day for birthday festivities, even if it is a smaller, immediate family only day. I’ve heard of people opting to celebrate half birthdays in lieu of actual birthdays, getting the celebration away from the holidays all together. This makes friends from school more likely to be available, outdoor activities possible, and helps prevent loading too many expenses in one month.
Be Intentional About Gifts
When you have young children, they are always wanting things. New toys, clothes, experiences, and more are constantly being brought up. Encourage your little ones to start their list early and even to keep separate lists for their birthday and the holidays. No one wants a reindeer sweater for their birthday, no matter what time of year it is. Having two lists makes it easier to make their birthday special as they know that what they receive is truly for their birthday. Look at ways of creating joy throughout the year with gift of experiences away from the holidays. Museums, water parks, escape rooms, arcades, and local performances are all great experience gift you can usually get well ahead of time to use as a birthday gift.
Buy Extra Wrapping Paper
For the sake of all that is good in the world, do not give a child a birthday present with the same paper as what is going under the Christmas tree. Better still look for creative ways to package gifts that don’t require wrapping paper at all, especially for older children that don’t care if they get to shred paper. Making sure other aspects of their birthday are not left overs or holiday themed is a great way to make it feel more special as well. No holly-trimmed napkins or menorah plates at these parties!
In the End
It is always going to be a challenge to make your kids feel special around the holidays. But it is the attitude and spirit of love you bring to your child’s life that will truly shape how they see their birthday. As parents, it’s not always a breeze to balance everything that needs to be done to create a great birthday alongside holiday travel and school wrapping up, but our kids will look back as adults and be thankful that we made sure their birthday felt like a birthday, rather than a footnote to the holidays. At least, we hope they will.